Finally, a Coherent Worldview
Around the time of my previous post, I had just been received into the Orthodox church. Since then I have found it to be everything I was looking for, and a great deal more. There is such a wealth of wisdom, going back thousands of years. And it was all there, un-seen, un-read, as far as I was concerned not existing at all! It seems impossible to me that I was so unaware of these treasures by chance.
Father Seraphim Rose, Saint Paisios, Saint Porphyrios, Elder Thaddeus of Vitovnica - to name only a few! - lived in this world, recently. They speak plainly and lovingly about modern and familiar concerns. Their example and guidance are a priceless treasure! And not only they help me, but participating in the tradition of the Orthodox Church has... I don't even know how to say it all. I have experienced how the prodigal son felt when he took a few trembling steps back to his father, and instead of the rejection or anger he had earned, he received joyful, unearned forgiveness. His father ran to him while he was still far away!
Here is what I know, now from experience: Jesus Christ is life and truth and love. To look for life, or truth, or love apart from Him is pointless! It's a contradiction, like looking for light by marching into the shadows. God made me, and He loves me more than I love myself. Because this is true, I want to do everything His way, even if I don't understand it at first.